Saturday, August 12, 2017

A fresh start! OH IT'S AUGUST 2017!


Oh ya Allah i don't even know where to start. Firstly, i am SO SO excited for not losing this blog. Oh no no im not gonna lose this one. It has given me so so much memories especially the high school ones eventhough my writings are mostly crap but wtv i love myself for keeping on writing for myself, not for anyone to read. Well, if they do that would be such pleasure. I really love how my taste in choosing something is very cool and simple just like the white background here, it's so clean and is not gonna be washed away by years. Oh and im thinking to keep my spinning rabbit too!! 🐰🐰🐰🐰🐇🐇 yay!! (im so cool how did i even have that stuff) Im glad im into blogging since i was belas belas years old cause you will never know you could actually heal the future you. You are enough yourself, sweetie.

Oh i feel like jumping around!!! anyway, i diverged to wordpress for about 6 months but then i realised how my heart wasn't there everytime i look at my site. It was exciting for sure but yknow, this one feels SO MUCH like home. 😍 💞💞💞  LOOK HOW BLOGSPOT HAS IMPROVED CAN INSERT EMOJI SOME MORE!!! OH MY GOD...??? SO COOL I TELL YOU

So basically how i ended up here was......i dont know, there was this one friend of mine asked:

"farina, kau tak tulis blog ke?"

and i was

yea.....i write but im not making it public cause i shy like dat.

Truth is, on my wordpress blog, i publicly put it on all my socials bio. People started to read my words, that is exactly what i want. But on the days that im not feeling myself, i want to write it too but i can't cause if i do, they wont get anything (knowledge) from me. It will be solely my deep dark side which i do not want people to feel that. Im scared if people look like im making a big deal out of it when it actually affected me deeply. Being judged. That is.

So i stop writing. Not because i want to but because i choose things that i wanna write, you know.. And it doesn't feel like myself anymore. It is more to faking myself happy and telling i am doing okay but i am not. I am certainly not. Especially when it comes to here, in Manipal. Gosh.

To be frank, i wanted to make another new blog site but i feel sad cause i already written a whole lengthy posts in the wordpress but i have to start from scratch here. I hate wasting time reorganizing to my preferences cause im very simple but cerewet. All the fonts, the backgrounds, titles, labels, urgh ok stop. I also dislike seeing my "posts" to be written ZERO. i wanted people to see that im already into blogging since fetus lol ok yea i am old enough in this world, true yeah..??

I was just trying my luck signing in and BAMMMM IT SIGNED IN. I love keeping one password for everything i have in my life lol you should do that too! So ive decided to keep this blog, no matter how shameful it will be if my friends read all the malay crap things i wrote. Hey, i was young ok?? 😂😂😂  I think i just have to write more so they'll be tired to scroll and keep up only to the newest post lol im smart i know hehe.

This is the start of something new! New life, new friends, new problems, new dramas, new change, new surroundings and same 'ol tears.

Well maybe im not meant to write smart stuff here hahaha cause im just always too hormonal and emotional. Having feelings is tiring!

I look forward to write more! I have few posts drafted in mind now lol i looooove writing and i miss it so much i know a part of me is here somewhere, since the past 5 years. Until next post,


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