Tuesday, August 15, 2017

4 years of friendship is saved, today


I have this conflict with jal who is the person i was very very closed to until he replaced me with someone that i dont um.. prefer? (hate) At first i gave them space and i chill my ass down but i have been silence for 4 months and he still did not realise anything especially i made our distance CRYSTAL CLEAR. But man, boys can be so dumb. The more i think, the more my heart aches knowing that i was at her place before!!! for god sake i. am. not. jealous. I just felt replaced and it's different...............

After i finished phonecall with my boyfriend, i just can't sleep. And it makes me think so hard that i know i couldnt bear it anymore. So i called amzar unintentionally cs i tengok he was active in instagram last night. Then we talked, i honestly cried but i cover la cause malu but i just felt extremely sad considering we ignored each other for months and he chose perempuan tu over me!!!!

Ikhmal was there too so they both comforted and dyingly asked me to confront and talk to jal myself and put my pride down for the sake of saving my heart from ached and our friendship. Ikhmal said he would be so dissapointed if he knows the next morning that i didnt call jal lol but they're so nice to me.

They said "honestly, far, you cannot be alone. It's difficult and you have to face them for more than 5 years later on and just so you know we're here. Just called and cakap "hey i need some of your words or just ask to lepak together, we're definitely okay with that"

see.....that's the reason i have >>more guy friends that girls cause tbh girls are troublesome.

And so i did..... I braved myself (aka forced) to called then it says he was on another call. I WAS PISSED I KNOW HES ON CALL WITH THAT freaking bitch. So i sad.....and amzar went to jal's room to make sure he didnt. Turns out it was hemen calling to ask jal to play dota lol wtv then i tried second time.

And we talk............................. until 4 am

penat tulis. im sleepy so i guess i continue this someother day lol goodnight

(its 2pm lol bye)